Solitary Man
by Rachel Cabbit
Summary: Syaoran Li is always seen as a handsome, rich playboy, but he wants much more than a onenight stand. He's almost given up on finding the one though. Until he meets Sakura...
1. Part 1: Syaoran Li, the Solitary Man

**Solitary Man**

**Disclaimer:** I do NOT own Cardcaptor Sakura (CLAMP does)

_AN: _REUPLOADED at last._ I suggest listening to HIM's "Solitary Man" while reading this, as this story was originally a song-fic._

**Part One: Syaoran Li- The Solitary Man**

I know that I'm a fool. I can't help myself. I see a pretty face, looking at me with what appears to be love-filled eyes and I get carried away. I forget that love is fickle. It doesn't exist.

What I think could be love, is just lust. And I make the mistake of believing the wrong thing. I need to learn. I've been hurt so many times. Once was too many.

Here I am, the head of the Li Corporation. Aged twenty-seven, with untameable brown hair and golden tinted brown eyes. I know martial arts and train a lot, so I am fit and healthy. I am rich and popular. To the unknowing eye, I have everything. I am a playboy.

But that isn't true. All I want is a woman to love and a woman to care for me, to love me as much as I love her. But love doesn't exist. I've learned that through those girls who I thought loved me.

Walking along the corridors of my office building: heading to my empty luxury penthouse with no luxury actually awaiting me, I get eyed by the girls who work for me. None of them see me as a man looking for love. I am just the mega-rich company president who, if they screw, they will receive a raise or a promotion from.

Not going to happen. I've had enough. Those women are only selfishly looking for material things and not what I am looking for. I won't be hurt again.

I get to the elevator. Cold silver doors slide open and I enter, pressing the button for the basement floor where the car park is. I wait, as the elevator went down a floor or two. Only another twenty-seven to go…

Unfortunately for me, the doors slid open once again and a trim looking woman entered, her stiletto heels clicking on the floor. Her skirt was a little too short and her perfume quite overpowering and not my thing at all. Her cerulean eyes cast a quick look at me. I could see it on her face. It dawned on her, that I was the boss. She pouted her lipstick-brightened lips seductively, perhaps noticing that I had been looking at her. Yes, she was attractive. But I knew that she was not what I needed. Physically, maybe. But not what I needed emotionally. It was the last thing I needed. A woman who would pleasure me but not stick around for long. Someone who would get what they wanted and leave. Just like the rest of them. Or failing that, she would stay a while, but have a few other guys on the go. That had happened before too.

The woman made a big thing of dropping a file she was carrying and bending over in front of me. The view was appealing, but too obvious. She wanted me. But, I'd never met her before. She didn't know me and I didn't know her. How could she be what I was looking for? No one can love someone they have only just seen and never spoken to. It was ridiculous. I was about to say something, but stopped myself. I decided to ignore her. It was hard, the way she got up and swung her golden waves of hair back, before slyly looking to see if I had seen her. I made sure to look away, remembering the promise I made. This was not going to affect me. I was going to find a girl who I knew instinctively was the one for me. And this temptress was not the one.

Finally she left, slightly disappointed. I relaxed, pleased that I had kept my promise to myself.

Eventually the elevator had reached my destination. I got out, the cold concrete basement around me. I searched and saw my flashy green sports car.

The drive home was as lonely as ever. Nothing to look forward to at home. Just an empty penthouse.

Maybe I can find someone eventually. Someone who will make me the happiest man on Earth. I hope I can find her.

Parking the car, headed up to my top-floor penthouse. I dropped my car keys on the cabinet near the door and took off my jacket, throwing it across the leather sofa and walking over to the balcony window.

The view from here was quite good. I could see across the whole city, with all of the fluorescent lights and black buildings.

I know she's out there somewhere, but until I find her, I'll be a solitary man.


	2. Part 2: Angel

Part 2: Angel 

Morning came and brought with it nothing. I was still alone. Miserable. The weather outside mirrored my feelings. It was wet and cold. I got up and got dressed as usual. Ready for another monotonous day where I was to be followed by praise wielding workers who wanted nothing more than higher pay and promotions. Surrounded by women who threw themselves at my feet without even getting to know me.

After a quick bite to eat I was ready to greet the day with a fake smile and an umbrella.

I wore my black suit, as it seemed fitting the depressed mood I was in. I was mourning the death of the old me. The me that believed there were women out there who weren't interested in money. Women who wanted what I wanted – love.

My thoughts seemed to be like a broken record, playing the same thing over and over. But that was how I felt. Every relationship I have ever been in was like that. They all betrayed me. Over and over I suffered. And now my thoughts haunted me again. Repeating moments I'd rather forget, reminding me that this was for the best.

It was still early, the sun had hardly risen and yet I was heading to work. The pavement below my feet was stained dark with raindrops and the air heavy with damp. I walked to my car, sheltered from the rain by my dark umbrella. I had parked it in the court near the apartment. I got in, and sat for a moment. Preparing myself for the day, before starting the car up and driving off.

I reached work as usual. Not many people were actually in work when I arrived. It was still early. I got up to my office. It was tidy and organised. Opposite to my emotions. Inside I was messed up. But I don't want to let that interfere with work.

I sat down in my office chair. The black leather squeaked as I turned it around to face the big window. Outside below, was empty apart from the odd blur of a person, distorted by the congealing raindrops on the glass.

The office. Boring and plain. A professional environment that drives me insane. Sometimes I just want to go home and sulk all day. Have no people prying into my private life, no heavy image tailing me like a dark shadow ruining my life and people's opinions of me. Just sit at home with nothing to bother me, and sulk.

But that is impossible; after all, I am the head of the Li Corporation. I have duties to fulfil and meetings to attend.

I span back around in my chair and leaned on my dark antique desk. Pressing the interlink button I asked my secretary what appointments I had scheduled for this dismal day.

"There's a Miss. Daidouji to see you. Her design company is working with Li Corp and you need to go over a few things." I thanked the woman and released the button sighing. _Miss_ Daidouji. Another woman. I do not like working with women. They are just too crafty; you can never tell what they are thinking or how they will react. I looked amongst the paperwork in the fresh neat pile on my desk. Ah, yes. Tomoyo Daidouji. Head of the Tsubasa Designs Company, specifying in both graphic design and clothing design. She was here to work on the new ad campaign for Li Corp. I had to admit, the name Tomoyo sounded familiar. Maybe it was just a popular name? The meeting was scheduled for nine o'clock sharp. Not long to wait.

I wondered what type of woman Miss Daidouji was. She was rich - which I gathered from the fact that she owned and founded her own company; she wouldn't be after money in a relationship. She must also be intelligent because she had many academic credits to her name. But what the info sheet didn't tell me was what type of person she was, after all, rich and smart could add up to high-class snob. And that was not what I was looking for.

I could imagine a nice Japanese girl, long black hair neatly tied up in a bun, eyes like chocolate drops, but a stuck up, better-than-everyone, pushy attitude that spoiled the visage of loveliness she would appear to have.

Most women I knew were either like that, or they were whore-like and sluttish. I hate both of those types of women.

"Mr. Li?" A voice called on the intercom, "Miss. Daidouji is on the line requesting a reschedule."

I rolled my eyes. I wonder what she could have been up to in order to want to reschedule.

"What time for?" I sighed.

"12.30 at a café in town. He says she presents better when she's not in an office environment."

I just scowled. This had to be some sort of plot to try and seduce me, or something. A cosy café date… yuck.

I reluctantly agreed hoping it would be business that she would be presenting and not herself. I jotted down the name and address of the café and left my secretary to tell Miss Daidouji that the arrangement was fine. Even though I felt otherwise.

So I was left with just my thoughts until 12.30.

Luckily there were odd jobs to do. Fill a few forms in, make a few calls and so on. Time flew by and soon I was standing outside the cosy little café in town. I puzzled as to why accompany president like Miss. Daidouji would want a business meeting in such a… quaint place. The neat circular tables were covered in 'picnic basket' red and white checked cloth, the décor chocolate-box like with varnished oak furniture and a chalkboard menu hanging on the plain white wall. The odd pot of flowers dashed here and there made this more like a cutely old-fashioned tearoom rather than what I would call a café.

Definitely not business meeting material.

I straightened my tie as I entered, the bell jingling on the door as I did so. Looking casually at my watch, I saw that I was exactly on time. There was no one there, except a woman sitting at a table in the far corner. She had dark silken hair cascading down her back, pure snowy skin and she wore a neat grey business suit that was both stylish and sophisticated.

She caught me looking, our eyes meeting for a brief moment. Her gorgeous, unusual amethyst eyes struck me immediately. She politely stood up and put out her hand as I approached. I shook her hand, quite in awe of her beauty. Then she spoke. And yet again I was surprised. She was sweet sounding, well spoken and yet confident.

"Mr Li? I'm Tomoyo Daidouji, of Tsubasa Designs." Nodded, shaking myself out of the daze I was in.

"Ah, yes…nice to meet you, Miss Daidouji." I answered before we both sat down.

"Here, I'll buy you a drink." She offered. I thanked her, suspiciously, then asked for a cappuccino.

"Sakura, bring us two cappuccinos." She called before turning to me, "We have the whole place to ourselves – no interruptions." She added, winking at me friendlily.

I grew a little suspicious.

"Mr. Li?" She said looking at me in a strange way, a curious way, "I know this has nothing to do with business but…"

I cut her off.

"I'm not interested, sorry."

"Huh?" she gasped, a little confused by my words.

"I'm not looking for a relationship right now." I lied. Anyone this forward was a no-no.

She was expressionless for a moment, before a smile appeared on her face. She laughed, leaving me puzzled this time, by her reaction to rejection.

"No, no Mr. Li, I wasn't going to ask you out!" I froze. I could feel my face turning red. I'd made a mistake? No. This was probably just her way of dealing with rejection.

"I was going to ask you if you knew Eriol Hiiragizawa."

I nodded, still embarrassed at my false assumption.

"He's my cousin." I said. She smiled at me.

"Wonderful! I'm his fiancée." She explained.

This had to be the most embarrassing moment ever. I had just lost the respect of a company president by rejecting an offer she wasn't even making, embarrassing myself completely and giving my annoying cousin great ammunition to fire at me next time we meet. I could just imagine him.

"Remember that time you rejected my fiancée like a complete jack ass?"

I knew the name Tomoyo sounded familiar. He had said something about a girl called Tomoyo last time we talked. I had made a stupid mistake.

Oh man… the rest of the meeting was going to be torture.

"Sorry to keep you guys waiting." A soft and cute voice called from beside the table.

I looked up, my face still showing my embarrassment from before.

There stood an angel. No lie. She was a petite heavenly being, wearing a pure white apron over her pink shirt and denim skirt. Her skin glowed with health and radiated with beauty. Her smile towards Miss Daidouji showed that they were friends. That smile was amazing. The way her gorgeously pink lips curved up, her cheeks rosy, her emerald green eyes shining brightly. Her silky honey locks fell down onto her shoulders…

I was in complete awe of this girl. It was as if an angel had visited us from heaven.

"Here are your coffees." She said, putting down the coffee onto the table and smiling directly at me.

"Thanks Sakura." Miss. Daidouji said.

Sakura…such a beautiful name. Such a beautiful woman.

No. No one is so beautiful and innocent. She can't be right for me. Anyone that pretty must be a gold-digger or a slut. She just didn't seem like one though. I was intrigued by her, watching as she walked away. Every movement she made. Every swish of her hair, every step she made. My eyes followed.

Miss. Daidouji cleared her throat.

"Mr. Li? Back to business please…"

I shook out of it.

She couldn't be who I was looking for. Or could she…


	3. Part 3: Recruitment

**Part 3: Recruitment**

It had been days since I had first met Tomoyo Daidouji, but I could not rid my mind of the image of her waitress friend. Her every move made that day was etched into my memory, haunting me like a vision I could not hope to touch. Every swish of her hair, every breath she breathed, every smile she cast over at Tomoyo, but not me.

She seemed nervous of me, despite her original friendly smile at me as she served me my drink, she seemed very eager to avoid my gaze. Perhaps she knew I was watching her. Maybe I looked like a hungry beast and she was scared in case she suggested an interest that was not there, but whatever the case was, she only smiled at Tomoyo and not at me. I didn't see why I was so bothered. She would offer me nothing but free drinks and a few casual nights… it was unrealistic of me to believe a stunning angel such as herself would be interested in a long term relationship with me when she was beautiful enough to ensnare several perhaps richer men. She would use me to escape her waitressing job, and then when I'd given her money and fine things she would leave me cruelly. Like others had done before.

Something inside me laughed at my pessimism. Especially when a part of me was giving me the all clear, saying how sweet and innocent she looked. It would be complicated, with her being the friend of my cousin's fiancée. Any unease we felt between us after our relationship would be passed on to our relationships with Tomoyo and Eriol.

There I was thinking over in my head at work, all the reasons why and why we should not date, when really I knew only that she was called Sakura and that she was the gorgeous waitress friend of a work associate who happened to be my cousin's fiancée. I knew nothing of her age, her likes, dislikes, whether she was already taken, or even if she liked me. I assumed it didn't matter, because I was so attracted to her.

Once I realised that, it dawned on me why my relationships were doomed to failure.

I was so selfish.

Then, the more I thought about it, the more I figured out.

My problem was that I waited for women to come to me. They made the first move, and I was so self-absorbed that I did not bother to ask questions as to why they chose me. I showered them with gifts and artificial love while they pleasured me, until the day they grew bored with my selfish love-buying and left me. It made sense that I was so arrogant that I assumed all women loved me, when really they loved the image of me, which is what I had become; an attractive, rich man.

Perhaps, I thought after signing a few forms, perhaps I should make a fresh start. Forget about being a solitary man, and try a new approach. I decided to visit Sakura in her little café, and talk to her myself. I would make the first move for once, and I would watch out, making sure that if she liked me, it was for me and not my money.

Lunchtime came, and it took a while for me to raise the courage to open the café door.

It was as quaint as the last time I had set foot in there, only when I opened the door and heard the soft tinkle of the bell; it was a faint sound against a quiet murmur of voices. There were many tables filled with people on their lunch breaks. Mostly female office workers, some dating couples and some chattering old women. It made it seem… cosier somehow.

I found a solitary seat in the far corner of the café and scanned the plastic-glazed menu for some lunch and a nice sounding coffee, all the while looking around to find a familiar trace of Sakura.

"May I take your order?"

I turned quickly, my hopes high. Unfortunately, it was not my angel. I mumbled an order of a plain coffee and a ham sandwich.

The brunette waitress was pretty, but not Sakura. I scolded myself for hoping too much and acting so disappointed when the woman turned out to be a different waitress. It seemed silly of me to hope Sakura was the only girl working at the café.

I would be lying if I didn't say the whole situation made me grumpy that afternoon. I didn't realise how much I had wanted to see Sakura until I didn't actually see her. It left me feeling slightly empty inside.

Unfortunately for me, I had more work to do that afternoon.

It so happened that there was a new vacancy in my company, as I'd had to dismiss my personal assistant for her inappropriate behaviour towards myself. Her constant pleas for a date and her gossiping amongst other employees about my personal affairs were too much for me to forgive her for and so I had been left assistant-less for almost three weeks.

Today happened to be the day that my secretary had scheduled the interviews. She had done most of the work, sorting out the application forms and leaving me with the best possible choices for the job.

I was in two minds as to whether I should be sexist and refuse to hire female assistants, since that would save me the hassle, the likes of which had happened before. Then I thought twice. I would choose whoever had the best qualifications.

I flicked through the application forms that had been placed on my desk. Some were very qualified. Mostly women, to my dismay, but highly qualified women who would be good assets to the company.  
I was about to place the pile of papers down on the table when my eyes caught a word that surprised me.

"Sakura?" I read aloud, thoughts of the waitress rushing back to me. I shook my head to rid myself of them but the application form piqued my curiousity. I separated it from the rest and began to read it.

"Sakura Kinomoto, aged twenty six, born April 1st. Marital status is single."

My heart skipped a beat. No way could it be her though. The Sakura I knew worked in a little café as a waitress. There was no way she was qualified enough to be my assistant. She could not have made it through my secretary's filtering of candidates. I continued to read hoping for more information.

Then I noticed something that made my brain freeze.

Tsubasa Designs.

It said that she'd had a lot of experience working at Tsubasa Designs, even helping start up the company and she'd been a secretary for the company president, Tomoyo Daidouji for a few years.

Then I knew it was Sakura.

It read that she had been working in a small café, learning how to run a small business as it is her dream to own her own café one day.

I was stunned. Then realisation hit me. I would be interviewing her today. She was applying to be my assistant, to work with me every day.

It would be fair to say that I'd made up my mind to hire her. Or rather, my heart made up my mind for me, no matter how I tried to seem impartial and sensible about it all. I knew it was wrong to think so, but I was not giving my full attention to the other candidates when they arrived for interviewing. Each time the door opened I had hoped to see Sakura walking through the double doors into my office, but was disheartened when each time it was someone else, someone less heavenly.

It was getting towards six o'clock and I was worried in case she had dropped out, when I got a message over the intercom.

"Miss Kinomoto is here for her interview now, Mr Li. Shall I send her in?"

I swiftly said yes and straightened myself up to meet her once more, my heart pounding wildly.

There was a tiny knock on the door, to which I answered "Come in". The door slowly opened and a frightened looking Sakura peered around the door.

"Sorry for intruding." She said quietly, shyly even.

"There's no intrusion, you are here for an interview aren't you?"

She nodded, the door now closed behind her as she stood there with her hands crossed on her lap.

"I'm sorry for being so late though – there was a problem at my current place of employment and I was needed to fix it." She bowed politely, and I offered her a seat, quite taken in by her sweet and shy nature. She was as beautiful as I had seen her before, only dressed more formally in a grey pencil skirt and a fitted light green shirt. Green was my favourite colour.

I shook my head away from thoughts of her shirt, as I was sure I was staring, and I didn't want to scare her away and give such a bad impression.

"Now, Miss Kinomoto," I began, trying to regain my professional demeanour, "may I ask why you have applied for the position? You did seem to be enjoying your job at the café, last I saw you."

She blinked, as if trying to remember when she'd seen me. My heart sank with the thought I had not made the impression on her as she had on me.

"Well, Mr. Li, Sir, it is my ambition to own my own small business eventually, and I see this job position as an opportunity to see and learn how big businesses work and to refine skills I have not had to use for a few years. I'm eager to see the company go far, especially since my best friend's company is working closely with you now."

I liked how she made sure to show enthusiasm for the company. I think that with any other girl I would have scoffed at the over-use of praise and the use of name-dropping almost in mentioning her friend, but with Sakura it sounded cute and naïve. I completely forgave her. I knew then that it didn't matter what she did during the interview, I would have her as my assistant. It was as though I was powerless to stop myself for making that decision.

I was boldly examining her features; the delicate nose, the perfectly pouted lips, and those angelic eyes of the most beautiful green I had ever seen. She noticed the attention I paid to her and her face flushed a bright shade of pink. It was so endearing I could hardly stop myself from giving her a hug. Luckily I remained professional and took my eyes away from her beauty enough to continue the interview.

"Miss Kinomoto, could you please describe to me a situation in which you have had to use problem-solving skills recently?"

She nodded and an adorable look of concentration formed on her face. She looked deep in thought for a moment and then began to form her answer.

"As I currently work in a cafe, I have had many opportunities to solve problems. I am often charged with training new staff and today I was urgently needed to help a trainee who was having problems with a coffee machine." She paused, to take a breath.

I decided to interact with her.

"Is this why you were late?"

"Yes Sir." She nodded, her hair bouncing, glistening in the brightness of the overhanging lights. She continued.

"I then took charge and examined the machine. In realising it was in need of professional repair, I showed the trainee how to make coffee without the machine and I lowered the coffee prices slightly to apologise to customers. I then called a repair company and arranged an out-of-hours time for the repairs to be made."

"All this, and you managed to make it to this interview near enough on time." I commented, "I am very impressed- especially with how you thought about your answer first. Many people just jump straight in without thinking and lose fluency and detail. You, however, Miss Kinomoto, spoke well, showed impressive problem solving skills and proved that you think rationally before acting."

Sakura tensed. She seemed confused and unsure of where this praise was leading. She had a good right to expect this to be a 'compliment sandwich'; however I had no such thing in mind. All I could see was the positives.

"Miss Kinomoto," I began, hesitating a moment. I was unsure of how to tell her, without frightening her. "Miss Kinomoto, I hope I am not being too forward in saying so, but... well... out of all the candidates so far, you have impressed me the most. I can guarantee you the position. If you want it still, that is."

Sakura's look of confusion soon became a look of realisation.

"You mean... you are giving me the job?" She said in an almost-whisper, as if she were too frightened to ask aloud.

I nodded, smiling as warmly as I could. It had been a while.

Sakura jumped up from her seat and clapped her hands together joyfully.

"Oh! Thank you Mr Li!" She beamed, "I was so nervous about meeting you a few days ago, and when Tomoyo brought you into the cafe I was so shy I could hardly speak, and now you have hired me! Oh my gosh! Thank you!"

Sakura's enthusiastic outburst would have irritated me if it were any other person, but my opinions on this angel had already been so positively formed, it seemed impossible that anything could make me think less of her.

I found her joyous mood quite contagious and as we settled details and paperwork, I started to feel as happy as I was last time I was in love.

The melancholy all forgotten in her presence, I had at last rid my mind of those old affairs that had plagued my heart.

She was able to start in one week's time after giving her cafe employer notice of her change in career. I had never wished a week away as fervently as I did in that time. I could hardly concentrate on my work, as every thought I had led to the reminder that in just seven days heavenly Sakura would be sitting at a nearby desk, talking to me and assisting me.

What thrilled me more was the thought of being close to her and discovering more about her. I was not going to make the same mistakes as I had done in previous relationships. I wanted this one to be the one. The only one, for the rest of my life.


End file.
